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  • Maria Greco

Holy Dating

“When a man loves a woman, he has to become worthy of her. The higher her virtue, the more noble her character, the more devoted she is to truth, justice, goodness, the more a man has to aspire to be worthy of her. The history of civilization could actually be written in terms of the level of its women.”

-Venerable Fulton Sheen

Love is the answer to everything. Love and only love. Anything that falls short of what love demands is not love. Many young men and women nowadays are pursuing an ideal that is not love. They are searching for this in the pleasures of the senses, in view of what society says and striving to achieve the approval of the world. This in turn leads them to a continual void of heart, a thirst for truth, a thirst for true, genuine love that is not being quenched, a thirst for peace. Yet, most of them are looking for it in all of the wrong ways. God created the human heart so that it can only be satisfied and at peace when it is filled with Him and Him alone.

"The LORD God said: It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suited to him." Genesis 2:18

For men and women called to the vocation of holy matrimony, it is necessary and crucial that they date only under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit's guidance. Our Lord states in Holy Scripture that He "will make a helper suitable to him". God created the woman that Adam would be espoused to. It was not Adam's choosing, it was Gods.

“This one, at last, is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh." Genesis 2:23

There is a sense of wonder and amazement in Adam's words at seeing for the first time the woman God had created and chosen for him. And this was all God's doing. Adam simply said yes to His plan. Our Lord in His paternal care and goodness continually speaks to His children. He warns them, admonishes them and guides them. He does not lead a man or a woman into a toxic relationship. Rather, when a soul invokes the Lord to reveal to Him whom it is He wants that soul to pursue, there is peace and goodness. Yet, many a times the man or woman will "run through all the red signals" in a relationship because they want their will, not God's Will. This in turn leads to confusion and a darkness of the mind. The soul has chosen to say no to God and so will reap the consequence.

The man or woman seeking to be in a relationship should date intentionally. Their thoughts should be "if it be God's Will". There was a beautiful man and woman who had been praying for the spouse that God would reveal to them. They had met each other and were so in love. While I was speaking with them, the woman had clearly and openly said, "if it be God's Will." Both her and her boyfriend knew that God's Will was what they desired no matter what that was. Their relationship was based in prayer, in communal with God. They loved each other and so they left their will's to God's, trusting and knowing that His will was better and what He had planned would satisfy the desires of their hearts.

The most sublime example of a holy couple is the Blessed Mother and her most chaste spouse, St. Joseph. God chose these two holy souls to espouse each other. Their relationship was pure and filled with love and was chaste. They loved each other and their wills were completely aligned with God's Will. God chose each of them for the other. It was all His doing and it was their joy. Their "yes" to each other was a "yes" to God and also a "yes" to our salvation. When the soul is aligned with God's Will, He brings about miracles. When the soul is aligned with God's Will, there is peace, there is joy.

God is the One Who leads, we simply follow. May His Will be done.

"The plan of the LORD stands forever, The plans of His heart from generation to generation." Psalm 33:11

Venerable Fulton Sheen, pray for us.

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